Monday, February 22, 2010

I Do Remember You

Hello Customers,

Ok so I know in my previous post I said that I don’t really remember customers when they come in, well here’s the thing when you’re rude to me and cut me off before I have even said hello, I’m going to remember who you are.

For instance a specific customer, who shall remain nameless, comes into my establishment on a regular basis. The moment this specific customer enters there is a made dash from the servers to the hostesses to request not having this customer in their section because of situations like this:

Me: Hi how is ev…. (cut off)

Customer: I want a coke and they are all drinking water (referring to the rest of the party).

Me: Ok (said with smile) I will be right back. (Actual Thought = great here we go again)

Me: Alright here are everyone’s drinks…Are we ready to order or do …. (cut off again)

Customer: The last time I was here they got my order completely wrong, I don’t even know why I come back.

Me: I’m really sorry about that I’ll do everything I can to make sure today is better (SMILE, Actual Thought= I would LOVE if you never came back)

Customer: GOOD it BETTER be right today.

Me: Silence (Actual Thought= I have no idea what to say right now and I would like to throw that coke in your face)

Customer: Fine they are having a pepperoni pizza (interruptions from party)… NO that’s what you are having!!

Me: Silence (Actual Thought= you poor children)

Customer: Now I want a salad BUT NO meat, I’m ALLERGIC!!!!

Me: Ok wonderful, I’ll put that in for you right away and if you need anything else please let me know (BIG SMILE) (Actual Thought= Lady you are a LIAR you were in here last week and yelled at me because your STEAK wasn’t cooked right!!!!)

So there you go customers!!! Moral of today’s post we servers remember the terrible customers and just because we are smiling doesn’t mean I am not dreaming of throwing a drink in your rude face.

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Can I See Your ID????

Hello Customers, how is everyone doing tonight??

Excellent, Ok would anyone like a drink?? A beer? S

ure can I just check your ID?

This statement customer’s requires one simple answer: Sure you can check my ID, no problem.

However for some reason asking for an ID is like asking for $50!!!! Customers it is my job to ask for your ID and one day this will be seen as a complement.

As you can tell today’s post is geared towards the younger generation, especially those in the twenty-year range.

I know you are all super cool now because you can hang out at the bar and the novelty of being nineteen and showing people your ID has worn off, but I’m sorry children you still look like you are twelve years old. So when I ask for your ID please don’t give me a hard time. No I don’t know who you are, I don’t know your drink, and I don’t remember you from last week. I served 200 kids last week that look just like you, I can’t keep track.

Just pass me your ID and be happy or trying to get your next drink will be a little difficult. Remember I am your access to alcohol so keep me happy!!!

Finally for those less than nineteen here is a quick tip:

If you come in one night and ask me which fake ID looks more like you, don’t come back the next night and try and use it. In those cases I do remember who you are.

Monday, February 1, 2010

I only have 2 ARMS!!!

Hello customers, nice to see that you all made it back.

Today’s lesson is on clearing the plates.

Picture the scene: your appetizers are finished and you are waiting for the main course. The table is covered and you can see the restaurant is packed, and your wonderful waiter/waitress is running around trying to get to every table in his/ her section.

One would think it to be beneficial to take all the dirty plates and place them together so that when the main meal arrives the waiter/waitress will have a place to put the plates down. But here lies the problem customers; apparently certain people feel that we waiters/waitresses have five arms. So while I stand there balancing scolding hot plates on my arms I am also supposed to clear the plates from in front of the customer and pass the plate down a table that is longer then my own body.

As a courtesy just stacking those plates prior to your main course arriving would greatly reduce the number of burns I have on my arms. Also if you can tell that your waiter/waitress is a tad on the short side reaching to take the plate from him/her would be helpful, unless you rather see him/her struggle to make it to the end of the table.

This little bit of help can change your servers thoughts from “Are you kidding me what do I look like an octopus?” too “ Thank you so much I wish everyone else was as helpful”.